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Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors, Caring for the Families of the Fallen

Caring for the Families of our Fallen Heroes

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Introducing Shanette Booker

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Date: April 20 , 2012

Home Page Tabs Title: Introducing Shanette Booker

Posted By: TAPS

On 19 August 2011, I lost the love of my life, my soul mate, best friend,and partner in life via self-inflicted injuries. I do not hold that as the cause of death, only because I know the true cause of death to be medicinally induced death (but that’s for another day). That day was the hardest day of my life to deal with and to face, but I have survived it and continue to survive it, not just for myself, not just for our children (friends & family), but for him. I had to, I had no choice, and I knew that for Dre, I had to survive, because he coudn't.

Text:

Introducing Shanette Booker

I would like to welcome you to my world of wonder, wisdom, and widowhood. I am Mrs. Shanette Booker, wife of USMC Sgt. /USARMYSSG. Andre ‘Dre’ Booker. We met 14 March 2004, in beautiful Beaufort, South Carolina, where we fell in love and were married 22 October 2005. I met Dre while he was stationed at the Marine Corps Air Station, Beaufort, when he was just a Corporal in the Marine Corps. We have 4 very unique and lovely children 3 boys and 1 girl (2 boys are mine from a previous marriage, and his two arefrom a previous marriage and relationship).

In 2007 we switched from the Marines over to the Army. He was first stationed at Camp Castle in Korea, and then in 2008 we were stationed at White Sands Missile Range, NM. We survived 3 deployments (2 Iraq via Marines and 1 Afghanistan via Army). We did not enjoy the Army as much as we did the Marine Corps, but we learned to like it and deal with it.

On 19 August 2011, I lost the love of my life, my soulmate, best friend, and partner in life via self-inflicted injuries. I do not hold that as the cause of death, only because I know the true cause of death to be medicinally induced death (but that’s for another day). That day was the hardest day of my life to deal with and to face, but I have survived it and continue to survive it, not just for myself, not just for our children (friends & family), but for him. I had to, I had no choice, and I knew that for Dre, I had to survive, because he couldn’t.

I am now a wife of a Fallen Hero, mother to wonderful children, daughter to my mothers, and survivor of life. I am not the same person I was before, I am not going to be the same person I am now, later on, but I am me and for now, that will do. The love I have for him will not grow cold or old, but it will continue to stay warm and blossom and bloom greatly.

Last Edited by patti_1 at 10/30/2012 10:38 AM

Love you girl!!
Posted by: Sharron at 5/4/2012 2:42 PM

Thank you for sharing! I too, lost the love of my life in August 2011. I would like to hear more about the medicinally induced death sometime.
Posted by: Marcia at 5/14/2012 10:11 PM

Thank you ladies...Marcia, please keep an eye out for the Medicinally Induced Death Blog coming soon sweetie.
Thanks again ladies
Posted by: Shanette at 6/18/2012 8:49 PM

I lost the love of my life 8/1/2012, i dont know if i can make it through this. Its the hardest thing I ever had to do
Posted by: Marcia at 8/13/2012 11:05 AM

Marcia,
You are not alone in this journey sweetie. There is so much love, support, and helpful links, people, and connections here in TAPS, if you ever feel like crying, screaming, yelling about it, or just want to someone to talk to you pick up the phone and give TAPS a call the staff is wonderful and everyone is so helpful. We are all here for you sweetheart. 8/1/2012 my hubby should have been celebrating his birthday, so I know and understand the pain of that day that you are going through. If you want to talk, feel free to email me Southgal22@yahoo.com
Posted by: Shanette at 8/19/2012 10:08 AM

I share your pain as I lost my only child Sgt. Kyle A. Henry on October 31st 2011. That was the day my world fell apart. The hardest thing I had to do is not only say good bye to him, but to have to give his dogs away as I could not keep them. He had a birthday on August 20th and I had mine on Aug 16th. I thought that I was going to die, but I have to tell you that TAPS called me on both days to check on me and how I am doing. If you ever want someone to talk to you are free to email me and I would be sure to keep in touch with you. Everyone in our position needs all the help they can get. I can tell you from going to my first TAPS seminar in May and I have to tell you the entire group were so warm and comforting. It helped me to understand that there are so many other people like us out there.
Posted by: Patricia at 8/30/2012 2:53 PM

Shannette, your words parallel mine. My love, 1SG Myron Oxner of AR ARNG, died of self-inflicted wounds in April 2012. His actions, too, were medically induced, and when he realized what he had done he tried to get help; but it was too late. I am thankful that he called me to get help, because it helps bring a sense of closure, even though it doesn't take away the pain. The road of grief is hard but I proudly salute my husband, my hero. He loved me and our five children and he loved serving his country. God bless you and the other surviving spouses; each of us know what it is like to overcome.
Posted by: HappyMomOf5 at 10/31/2012 8:13 PM

I too lost the love of my life due to medically induced injuries. In October only four days after celebrating our 6th year anniversary my husband decided passed away leaving the biggest whole in my heart. Trying to find comfort in other to try to understand what my family is going through seemed impossible because no one that I have met has ever experienced this. I am thankful to be introduced to this organization because it lets me know that I am not alone.
Posted by: at 11/29/2012 12:58 PM

Hello Ladies,
Thank you for sharing your stories and encouraging words. My husband died unexpectedly two weeks ago at the age of 41. We have two beautiful children and a host of family / friends all of which are having a difficult time coping with the loss. My husband was my friend, my love , and my twin (we were born on the same day, & year). I feel so lost without him because we did everything together. I think about him all time because I miss him so dearly. I often put up a strong front in the presence of my family and avoid signs of weakness because I don't want them to feel obligated to stay with me and put their lives on hold for me. In fact at times I yearn to be alone with my thoughts and often drive out to the cemetery just for some alone time. I often feel like screaming " I'm feel terrible" when people ask how are you doing? I understand that my grieving process is still very fresh and I have a long way to go before my life will resemble any aspect of what I considered normal before the death of my husband. I Thank everyone for sharing because I know that I can not go through this alone. Please keep sharing!
Posted by: A.R at 3/8/2013 11:30 AM

I have stumbled upon this site and my eyes fill with tears as I read. I to can relate to you. I am an army reservist and my husband was Active army but past and a 100% disabled Army verteran. I lost my husband Mark Shaheer June 11, 2011 from self inflicting gun shot. This was and still is the HARDEST thing I have ever have to deal with. WE have three kids 2 boys, and one girl. Ages 6, 5, and 3 years old (current). Trying to understand something that is not understandable and trying to cope and raise children is very difficult. I thought that no one would ever understand my lost and what I go through. Here it is the month of April and our wedding anniversary would have been April 24 which would we would have been married for 6 years. There isn't a day that goes by that I dont think of him or his babies do not ask for him. I just pray for the strength to keep pushing forward and will do the same for you all.
Posted by: Patricia at 4/3/2013 9:21 PM