Saturday Morning Message: Finding Comfort in Everyday Objects

Stress comes along when we are confronted with something emotionally difficult. Although it can come when you least expect it, lately our nation is under a great deal of stress and we all may feel it. On top of that, we continue to experience personal grief following the loss of our loved one. This is when something we can touch or look at may bring us a bit of peace. The opening picture is the heart locket I wear everyday. Inside is a small picture of my son, Bryon. When I feel stressed, I often find myself putting my hand up to feel it’s smoothness, which creates calm. That small act seems to quiet me. Today you will read how other survivors find calm when feeling stressed. 

From Samira, mother of Andres: One of his pillows, a pair of his pants and this heart pillow came from Japan. When I hold the heart pillow, it is like Andres saying to me, “This is my heart. Hold it.” It really helps me! I sleep with it every night. I really miss him a lot.

From Debby, spouse of Thomas: I have a necklace that contains a small amount of Tom’s ashes in it. It reads, “My husband, my friend.” Whenever I am extremely stressed or worried, I will hold it in my hand and usually will rub the smooth back of it with my thumb. It acts like a “worry stone” for me. It helps to remind me that Tom would be telling me “Will this matter in 10 years or 100 years?” or “You’ve got this, kid.” Those were two things he would always tell me whenever I was stressed or doubted myself and my abilities. Other times, I will just hold it in my hand and it will feel either cool or warm, which also is calming because I remember how much I was loved and that “love lives on.”

From James, father of Andrew: I do OK with stress, though I find certain things helpful to feel more at ease and relaxed. Someone gave us a rose plant after Andy passed. It’s comforting to watch it grow and develop. It just started blooming. The first flower this year appeared hidden way down low. Through what’s obvious Andy keeps his presence known - as long as we pay attention. I know his comment, “How hard is it? It’s obvious!” I smile. I think of Andy’s smiles and I feel relaxed.